There are some people I know that have been wishing that I would just cut to the chase and put into words exactly what I claim to do as an ‘intuitive channel’. I felt that it was necessary to explain to an extent with the previous posts in the ‘Science of Me’ series, what my beliefs are and my particular perception of the world and my reality. It has been my way of creating a basis of understanding of who I am as a person.
What I do
I have the ability to read people, my environment, objects, in fact anything that is within my field of perception. I translate, or ‘channel’ for wont of a better word what it is I feel into terms that are mutually understandable. It’s an ability I have always had to my knowledge, and my desire to understand it has been the impetus behind my exploration of the mind, ‘paranormal’ experiences, ESP, psychology, shamanic practises, the nature of perception, quantum physics, and ultimately metaphysics.
In order to simplify, I’m going to narrow things down to my interaction with other people specifically. When I come into contact with someone, whether they are standing before me or are thousands of miles away, I can feel them. It is like a strong electrical impulse that I feel in the pit of my stomach, or the area of my solar-plexus, and it is as physically tangible for me as any part of my body, or any object that I may come into contact with. It is such a powerful sensation, that I can feel the fluctuations in a person’s mood, and the direction of their conscious focus. The moment that person disengages their focus from me I feel it as abruptly as someone switching off a light. So I know when someone is directing their thoughts toward me, because I feel it intensely. It often catches me unaware, seemingly appearing out of ‘nowhere’, and it will last for mere moments or longer. On occasion I will pick up a smell, or physically feel them touch me, or feel them looking straight at me as if they were standing there before me. The feeling intensifies further when the contact is deliberate and direct.
Frequently I’ll find myself thinking about someone and all of a sudden I get a phone call, or e-mail, or message of some kind from that person. Whether I am projecting the thought, or merely receiving it is open to debate from a linear perspective. This ‘connection’ is also more powerful and easier to read if I don’t have the usual sensory distractions, as I have discovered. So the less physically present and visual someone is, the clearer they are to me in many ways. My validation comes through the confirmation that people give me. As simple as that.
As a child I was always acutely aware of what people thought of me, I found the feelings hard to ignore. But because of the culture I’ve grown up in where much emphasis is placed on what can be physically seen or heard, with internal feelings and emotions being arbitrary factors, and separate from the outside world, I grew up learning to doubt what I could feel because I couldn’t explain it in terms that anyone could understand or were willing to accept.
The closest references that we have in the english language that in any way describe what this sense is for me are, instinct, intuition, ‘sixth sense’, ‘gut feeling’, an inner ‘knowing’, and perhaps most erroneously ‘psychic ability’. I am in no doubt whatsoever that my ability is in any way paranormal. I entertained the notion when I was younger in my desire to explain things, but it always fell short of what I knew to be the truth.
As far as I am aware it is not unique to me. We all have an inner instinct. Scientific culture quite happily accepts that this is the case across the spectrum of creature-hood, so why should it not be just as strong in humans? Well of course it is, but I think for some the awareness of this inner instinct is perhaps clouded by the reliance on the physical senses.
For me, however, I have always defaulted to my strong sense of instinct when it comes to interpreting the world around and within me. I have grown to trust it implicitly.
I believe that my acute awareness of this inner sense, this ‘instinct’ is further enhanced and intensified by the way in which I interpret information. I am a Synaesthete. Synaesthesia is a condition that occurs in some individuals whereby the neural pathways between the physical senses remain intact, where normally in most people they begin to separate during childhood as the brain and the body develop. This means that as a Synaesthete all of my senses are bound into one. So sound has colour and form, texture, smell, even a sound that is separate from the external sound itself. It is the same for images, the touch of physical objects, emotions, thoughts. The list is endless as are its permutations. It manifests itself in a number of ways for me, and provides added information/data if you will, about the world around me and its inhabitants. Every Synaesthete is unique in that the way it manifests for them will differ dramatically more often than not, so two individuals will not necessary interpret the same colour for a particular sound for example.
For me at least, my form of Synaesthesia correlates very strongly to the world around me in that I am able to read information that may not be obvious or visible by others. I have very much learned to interpret what I sense through my Synaesthesia so that I can be as specific as I possibly can be, and this I’ve done through years of observation and being aware of repeat patterns. My approach, dare I say it, has been very methodical and scientific. I’ve realised that certain colours that I may see, when for example they relate to an individual, mean certain things and that provides me with information that I can then verify.
For a time I experimented with distant readings, where the only information that I would ask for was a name. At this point in my early 20s I was as yet unaware of the term Synaesthesia. I would then interpret and record all of the sensory information that occurred to me from that name, as all names have colours and a barrage of other sensory information for me. Then I would ask the person in question to verify that information, and surprisingly what I discovered was how effective and in some cases very accurate it was on numerous occasions. It confirmed to me that my sense of knowing as a child what other people felt and thought was not a figment of my imagination. Furthermore, it seemed to work irrespective of distance. The implications were profound and thus I began my exploration of my abilities. I began reading the Seth books at around the time that I conducted my experiments, and to date it is the only source of knowledge that comes even close to explaining what I am able to do.
Some of you have already experienced validation of what I am able to sense from you. Others I know doubt my every word. Others are quietly unsure, but interested nevertheless. That’s fine by me. I welcome you all.
My peculiar ability has engendered within me a very accepting and diplomatic attitude toward others, so even if I sense something untoward I respect that others may not share my opinions or views. Also that someone else’s emotions and thoughts are not my own. It also gives me a sense that nothing is separate. It is difficult to discern, more often than not, a clear division between what I’m sensing from someone or something else and my own internal state. To all intents and purposes I step into that person’s shoes for a while and feel and think what they think, or at least a version of it. It’s not always an exact science, but that’s where my personal experience comes into it in being able to interpret what I sense into something salient.
There is always more I could add, but I think this will do for now my friends. Thank you for reading!